The Directors experience of homelessness
updated October 2, 2016
As of April 2015 I now have a cute studio apartment and early retirement
but rulers and people with power contact me to help this amazing idea get off the ground.
I had to push myself to write this letter
because it makes me sad and I am always optimistic, despite it all. You see, I
had a disaster outside my control and I never saw it coming. On June 10, 2010
which was two months after my beloved cat Miko was poisoned and electrocuted and had
to have him put to sleep. I froze him in my freezer until I could find some woods to bury him. This was the start of a 3 year ordeal.
Despite being born a rich white American girl only child of a good father who loved me dearly and was a Professor and Dean of a university. I found myself in last 20 years homeless four times. The first time it was on Christmas day a Radio show called heard of my 200 calls for help I had a deformed baby and about to loose my apartment on this snowing day. Sponsored me my baby and my cat a 2 week stay at a long term hotel plus $200 for food etc. Plus an invitation to a Christmas show and free gifts from the military. I ended up being accepted at My Sisters Place in the ghetto of Hartford CT for 18 months I stayed at a brick fenced community for women and kids homeless my place for fine 2 bedroom slightly furnished. daycare, counseling and signing in at certain times. I paid based on what I made only $90 a month. I fought for 18 months in court custody keep my full custody of my sick child from the rapist that made me pregnant. Believe it or not he won he had money to pay for what he wanted.
So another three homeless situations faced me after all this ordeal the last one was due to people hacking into my web site business and life running my credit score and business reputation.
My business was retired a slow death for 4 years now plus
my rent went way up and I cancelled not to renew my lease, threw my old
furniture out and had all my world processions packed into my car.
Even a room I wanted to rent cancelled the day I was to move into it. Now
on the streets with a few hundred dollars.
updated August 21, 2016
You see I was born an American, a white woman, from a rich family, but later in life had no family alive, no friends to help, and when homeless shelters rejected me cause funding was mostly for retarded those with mental illness or mothers with small kids I was last on any list. Snap food stamps and food pantries needed an address to get benefits. My motel room for a year was good enough for SNAP food stamps after a while. A woman in her fifties was a common homeless sight because she had no husband, no small kids, no family alive anymore could get no help. I was used as an example in courts but still got no help. Until I was 59 and retired early now with disability and $780 a month to live on. Who lives on less then poverty level 50% less then poverty. I had credit in mid 700 then it went down to 560-596 in four years. Everyone in rental and jobs rejected me for that alone. NO one has second chances unless you win the lottery or get large inheritance. Even then they said no we would not take you as an tenant cause of your credit. Credit used alone is a crime and makes those about to be homeless or HOMELESS chronically to stay that way.
After looking in three States for work and
no luck my car unable to pay for it was reprocessed and I was charged the
difference from the auction $4800. Shelters were full and many times rejected
me. Motel 6 in Vernon Ct was my home for a long while with a bus route. Then I
was no longer able to pay and I had no choice but to either sleep on the streets
directly and surely die or stay there at the motel for two months for free as I
face eviction. One day taking the bus to the free food truck drop off I run into
people I knew 35+ years ago who were in want and getting free food. They knew of
a homeless woman who knew of a woman with a house with a room for rent. No
security deposit was required only $100 a week just right in my extreme time of
need. A Hoarders house with control issues and a clothes washer that died,
electricity is off and on with little heat in late fall and the deck out back
the boards were falling apart. I was given a small room with no closet and my
frig in the room was about 1 ½ feet tall and later bought a two burner plate to
cook on. I am living over 2 years out of four bins of clothes and little things
that have not seen the light of day in 2 years. My mattress there has hard metal
springs giving me large bed sores but I am grateful for this place and soon it
will be a very long 2 1/2 years I have been here. I have a room without hope I cannot
get a job you see I have always had my own business and no boss to say I am good
hire plus my credit by now is so very bad. No one would want me as employee or
renter. In 2015 February to April 2015 at the hoarder house with a window open for years the landlady left open in her spare room caused the heater explode and no heat and no running toilet 6 below zero at night. So she says I have to leave I move into Motel and pay for it with my arrears of social security I receive because she did not want to mention me as a tenant after 2 1/2 years there. I had a lease but she had too many tenants legally so I kept quiet. So I could not get insurance benefit from hers to get a free hotel stay.
So I spent over $2600-$3000 of my arrears on a motel room for me for 7 weeks before I found my current studio apartment. She got a settlement for damage but I never saw any help from anyone including the State I live in.
This all is secret why? Because I am a former life coach I am ashamed I
cannot get myself on my feet and all people have turned their back on me. I am
embarrassed and it takes so much just to write this, for people judge what they
do not know… You see I have a genius IQ, extreme talent and a gift plus my soul
is angelic always helping others and giving people hope and help. I have done
nothing to deserve even 5% of my suffering and lack of seeing a way out. My
manuscripts have survived my ordeal for a God given purpose and by the grace of
God wish for the world to one day soon see and read
them. I now still have those three manuscripts.
My Therapist many years ago told me to
write a letter to my inner child here it is I pray it will come true for I need
You are precious to me. You are deep in my
heart and safe from the outside and others. I will cradle you in my embrace and
comfort your fears. I will give you everything you need and watch you grow. I
will make sure you grow and learn plus succeed in being the best human being you
can, and if you meet any people along the way that may hinder you, I will take
your hand and guide you away. Everything I want to give to you no one can take
away from you: education, knowledge, feelings and thoughts. I will give you a
safe love to believe in, hope in and will not come and go. I want you to attach
yourself to your inner child instead of people, especially men, who in the past
came and went and took with them the feelings you have given away so freely. I
know you can do well, and as you grow and settle down now and in the future and
until old age and death overtakes you I will surround you with love, light,
warmth, flowers, and plants that grow, animals as close companions, and children
you can help and love plus music for your soul. Through your writing and your
music, you’ll discover how talented and beautiful you really are. You’ll touch
people’s hearts with your talents. The rest of your life will be devoted to
that, and if by special; circumstances and blessings you meet another special
and beautiful soul as a mate. I will see to it that your life be complete
learning and fun is in your future. You can be yourself, and embrace yourself,
welcome yourself, see yourself, accept yourself, and say to yourself welcome to
this new life.
Thank you for your listening ear may my
story inspire others not to give up hope so maybe one day I will have hope this
ordeal has been a very long suffering I am ready to put behind
Love light – Eva
24 months ago in my 8 foot by 12 foot room I started "Hopeless to Hopeful Organization"
What others did not give me I pay forward with all my strength that remains
Those who find themselves homeless with no family no help and no
resources maybe families in cars that sleep there are good potential. It is a non-profit
to be organization called Hopeless to Hopeful H to H I still need funds to register it as non - profit
and make it legal for tax deduction contributions. I provide rest and roll carts with folded seats, computers with headsets training to go into your own business: it is time for me to make a
difference with what I understand best.
I successfully launched Hot Shots Promotions Inc. in Hartford CT, I successfully launched Executives Choice Cleaning Service for 31 years and Natures Findings back in 1970's after High School. Plus seven other companies. Only one business was started with $400 rest for no money. My week by week day by day pilot program walks each homeless or semi-homeless what to do and resources and links. Step by step on reestablishing yourself with communications, banking, mailings, etc.
My only fault is I put up with things I turn the other cheek too
often because my integrity has been chipped at many years of homelessness
turning everywhere and getting rejected. So I now go to therapy for the abuse
and have one friend at least. May my God in heaven hear my voice and
those with false accusations and love of judgment and self-righteousness will
stop. I still have no income, no car, no friends to help me physically so here
I am appealing to wisdom, knowledge and love for it is the most important ingredient in making the
I love my 3800+ friends with 6700 photos from 51 countries who love my angelic posts and pictures
bless them for loving me unconditional
If you wish to contribute any gift offering to get my organization off the ground without
initial tax deduction status please
Hopeless to Hopeful Organization
Po Box 712